Filthy Lies

I have been faithfully knitting away at MFS, lovingly crafting each stitch (even if there are a lot of purls) and I have been making rather good progress.

Here pictured is 4 inches of sweater, next to an almost decimated first ball.

My plan is to knit at least 2 inches every day which will finish the front in a little under 2 weeks. Then knit the sleeves two up, and then make the back. What I didn’t count on however was my gauge being totally and completely screwed. I was responsible! How could this happen. Instead of my predicted (and SWATCHED) 7 stitches to the inch and 10 rows to the inch, I am currently getting 7.5 stitches and 12 rows, from the same needles with the same yarn. Curse words and bad names. My gauge swatch is playing a very elaborate and very angry making practical joke on me.

Now the uninitiated in your ranks may be saying, “it’s only a half of a stitch, how bad could it be?”, well that half of a stitch translated over 175 stitches means that instead of getting the desired 25 inches, I have 23.3….And the instructions say not to block it, so I can’t even get up to my 25 inches from there. Damn. I can’t bring it in myself to frog it. Not after I have this much done already. So I remeasured my boyfriend (because he could have lost two inches around his chest in less than 24 hours right?) and saw he hadn’t changed. So I thought about the finished product which will probably be close to 46″ with this change of plan (which funnily enough is the measurement for the next size down. FML). I see that he will still have 2″ of positive ease in this new imagining of the sweater. This is the lower limit of the standard fitting sweater ease chart, which is what I wanted. It might be ok, guys. Maybe. I’m just going to knit in the wind and see what happens (hopefully a functional sweater)

To distract myself (and you) from the total chaos and disaster that is MFS at the moment, here are some lovely pictures of the gloves I finished knitting (not blocking, I’m kind of scared) for my boyfriend’s mother. They’re her Christmas gift.

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They are a beautiful lace pattern that I found here, and then superimposed on the back of a glove of my own patterning (really just a basic stockinette glove construction, nothing fancy) with a -10% ease. They are knit in Cascade’s Eco Alpaca, Jet Twist colorway. 100% undyed baby alpaca. This woman means something to me. The gloves turned out exactly according to my swatch. (Hear that MFS, I have options!)

If that wasn’t the best part, this is what’s left of my first ball (I have 2)

There is at least a quarter of this 220yds left. These gloves took way less yarn than I anticipated. Also, am I the only one fascinated by the magic that is center pull balls? Especially this center pull ball made from a nostepinne (aka one of my large wooden needles)? It’s hollow but still keeping it’s cute little shape.

Anyway, I think I’m going to make a matching hat for the gloves. Maybe this one. I’ve wanted to make this hat for a while. I’ve always been a fan of replicating cool knits I see in movies or shows. Once Upon A Time is killer on my wallet for that reason. Too many cool hats.

Also to add to the filthy lies I have been told recently, I was told that it was Fall. Autumn. The season right after summer. Pumpkins, apples, and falling leaves.

Do you see the white things flying willy nilly in this photograph? Yes, this is snow. Betrayal. Vile betrayal. Go home, winter, you’re drunk. Now you might be thinking, but you’re a knitter, isn’t this your element? No, no. Just because I love making hats, scarves, gloves and socks (all of the accoutrements of winter), doesn’t  mean I ever intended to have to use them. Curses. Michigan weather foils my carefully laid plans to not live in the cold for another year, 22 years in a row by my count (but don’t trust me on that one entirely, we’ve seen I am clearly incapable of counting).

Yesterday, my boyfriend and I ventured out in this vile wrath of some frozen Satan flurry, and we went to what qualifies as five star dining in our small, northern Michigan college town

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We ate good food, and went to the store afterwards to pick up a bottle of wine to drown my despair to help me get through my sweater problems. On the way we saw a man on the side of the road with a sign and a service dog. I’ve seen him there before with his dog. I know people like this are controversial, and some choose not to help them or to say “well, I’ll give them food but not money, they’ll probably only spend it on drugs/booze/cigarettes”. And to that I say, seriously? You need to put a qualifier on your generosity? I think it takes a serious swallowing of pride to be on the side of the road, for everyone to see. And honestly, sometimes what these people need isn’t a bunch of groceries that they can’t carry or store. Sometimes they do need $5 for a cab, for a haircut, for a variety of reasons. And if they do spend the pocket change I can give them on a beer or a pack of cigarettes, I’m not going to feel bad about showing compassion for another human being. An adult human being, capable of making decisions about their own life, good or bad. Given the state of the weather, we put together something small to help. We wanted to make sure he could carry it easily.

(disregard my wine) We bought a small blanket, some dog treats and yes I did take out $5 (for the reasons above). It’s what I can afford to give, and I hope that it can make even a small difference in someone’s life.




3 thoughts on “Filthy Lies

    1. Then I’d be worried it’ll bloat right up and look like a wonky not-rectangle. Damn my tight knitting. I think I’m just going to wing it and hope for the best lol


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